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Being a Man

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  • #6208
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    R.Murphy
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    It’s been said so many times that this is a man’s world. In many ways, this is true. However, evolution will prevail over time. Everything in life changes. Being a long time student of Tai Chi, I am aware of the dynamic nature of life. When we resist the ways of nature, we create stress. Change is the most natural characteristic of the cosmos. Too many men strive to deny and therefore resist change in their quest for power and control. This need for power may be rooted in frozen needs from a troubled childhood. I believe recent generations of men [and women] have been negatively affected by the exposure to alcoholism as a child. Adult Children of Alcoholics struggle to find a normal sense of identity. It can be a setup for multigenerational dysfunction. I believe that on a global scale, alcoholism is one of the major contributing factors for family dysfunction. This ongoing dysfunction causes men to become confused about what it means to be a man. This is what needs to be healed before men can confidently contribute to balance in the world. As a child, I noticed the devastating effects of being around a drunk. I have restored the freedom to remain sober, and therefore have succeeded in my marriage. If I had followed the lead of my step father, I would have been divorced. This would have led to a very self destructive pattern resembling a fight plane in a death spiral. By accomplishing what my father, and step father could not, I have the foundational root to face any stress and come out on top. I have managed to break the spell of dysfunction in my family. I take great pleasure in helping others to realize similar life goals. It takes a ‘personal revolution’ for many people to break free from the pain and shame associated with family dysfunction. However, life is changing. Good people are leading the way to positive changes. Things are about to begin to get better for the victims of abandonment, abuse and alcoholic dysfunction. Buckle up and hang on. The future promises to be quite a ride.

    #6218

    Thank you very much for this text of yours. I have the same opinion that alcohol is the biggest threat to family life and to men’s mental health. I have a history in A.C.A the 12 step programs for children of alcoholics and from other dysfunctional families. This program has taught me a lot about family systems and healing. I think awareness about some of the root causes in ones family is very important to get motivation enough to take on the work of shifting one’s life around. I am happy to have you here at this site and I look forward to more exchanges of ideas and other content.

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